Grays traveling to China to bring adopted son home

Jack Gray can't wait to teach his younger brother how to play all the sports the 11-year-old is passionate about. He is also eager to meet this new brother, 7-year-old Grant, who is awaiting adoption in China.

The two already have things in common: both love being outdoors — and both were born with cleft palates and lips, were abandoned by their birth mother and spent time in Chinese orphanages.

Ocoee residents Mitch and Lisa Gray adopted Jack when he was 2 years old. They had two grown daughters but felt God's call to adopt internationally.

“The first time his picture showed up on the screen, (Lisa) said, 'That’s your son,'” Mitch said. “It was the same process with Grant. My wife showed me the laptop and said, 'This boy needs a home.' I said, 'Let's go get him.' For some reason their photos jumped out at us and spoke to us.”

The Grays are now in the final stages of the adoption process. They are just waiting for the Chinese government to pick up their visas and final paperwork package.

“Once they pick it up (June 9) and approve it a final time, they will contact our agency,” Mitch said. “They will give us a several-week window so we can go get our son.”

A COSTLY PROCESS

The Grays have raised about $6,500 to go toward travel expenses; so far, only Mitch and Jack are able to go unless another $8,500 is raised. They felt it was important for Jack to revisit his homeland and be present as a comfort to Grant.

Airfare could be as much as $2,500 per ticket, and then the family must pay an orphanage donation of $5,700, plus there are the added costs of accommodations, in-country travel, agency guides and paperwork. The actual adoption process costs thousands more.

To make a donation, go to the family's crowdfunding page: gofundme.com/Jacksbrother.

“We really want my wife to go, and even if we have to borrow the money, we’ll figure it out,” Mitch said. “My wife and my mother went the first time, and I can’t imagine (her not being there this time). Meeting your son for the first time, it’s such a big bonding experience. … We will be in China for two weeks bonding with Grant. You just can’t lose that valuable time.”

Mitch hopes to have Lisa by his side as he and Jack go to meet Grant for the first time. They have only seen photographs and two short videos of him.

“In all the photos he's smiling, so he looks like a very happy young man,” Mitch said. “Jack wasn’t smiling in any of his photos, and that had me worried. He always looked like he was on guard. I was worried for nothing.”

PREPARATION

To prepare Grant for this transition, the Grays are making a book of photos with labels — brother, mother, father, house, dog — and putting together a package that they will mail to their new son.

They did the same with Jack, and they got back a photo of him looking at his photo book.

Both boys were listed as “special needs” because of their cleft lip and cleft palate; but Mitch and Lisa consider this minor because it can be corrected with surgery. Jack, a fifth-grader at Westbrooke Elementary School, has been under the knife a few times and will have more surgery before he's 18, Mitch said.

“A lot of people say, 'think of what you're doing for this child, giving him a home,'” Mitch said. “But I can't tell you everything Jack has given us. It's just remarkable. It's hard to put into words. … He's a great kid, and I know he'll be a great big brother. … He has absolutely changed our lives. He's my hero.”

At 55 and 52, respectively, Mitch and Lisa know they are the only ones among their friends who have such young children.

“Someone said, 'You just spent your retirement,'” Mitch said. “I said that's OK. Why wouldn't I give a child a home that needs a home? I just wish I could have started thinking this way when I was in my 30s. I would have had five or six.”

THE BOYS’ STORIES

The Grays know a little about their sons' early days. Grant was dropped off at a police station when he was 13 days old. Jack was a few days old when he was left at a first-rate hospital in China.

“We tell Jack, 'You know your parents loved you very much,'” Mitch said. “He was dropped off at the top hospital that deals with cleft palates. You don't know how far his mother had to travel to drop him off at that hospital. … His parents, just like Grant's parents, probably just couldn't afford to take care of them.”

The Grays didn’t hesitate to move forward with their plan. Foregoing an early retirement was an easy decision when it came to providing a loving home for two boys in need. And although they can’t take all of the children in, Lisa has spent a great deal of time advocating for China’s orphans by sharing their stories on social media. The Grays hope many more children can be as lucky as Jack and Grant.

“I tell Jack, this was God’s plan for you,” Mitch said. “It was meant for you to be with us.”

Contact Amy Quesinberry Rhode at [email protected].